Growing together as a couple

There is nothing more rewarding in a relationship than growing together as a couple.

However, growing together as a couple takes commitment and maturity.

Our life objectives and general interests may change over time, and that is ok.

In relationships, it is natural for people to develop in different ways. But different does not need to mean apart.

Our ego plays an important part in this process, as it tends to be possessive and needy. We do not belong to any one person. Instead, we belong to a Universe where we are all intrinsically connected, and it is this connectivity and interaction that allows us to grow.

The minute we try to isolate someone from this amazing web of growth in order to feed selfish needs is the moment we start to languish our relationships.

Just as we cannot grow alone, we cannot grow tided up.

We can, however, choose the path of growing together as a couple with awareness, respect and clear communication.

Awareness and respect for each other’s fundamental needs and aspirations, and clear communication of where each one wants to head.

Once we are clear of where we are individually and as a couple, we can define where we are heading. We don’t need to know every step of the way, as that is impossible to predict, but knowing where we are heading together is fundamental to keep focused and motivated.

James and I have been together for almost ten years now and our relationship has gone through different phases. However, from the moment we embraced a common major goal everything changed.

We made it clear to ourselves and to each other what we love, what we want and don’t want. We even identified what we still need to figure out. With this exercise, our relationship grew stronger.

Most importantly, our lives together became a project in work-in-progress. We may take different paths at times, but our final destination is the same.

Reading the book The Success Principles, by Jack Canfield, and going through all exercises was instrumental in this process.

I believe we are on this earth to evolve and be happy, but we cannot do it alone.

Any type of relationship is a challenge, so the art is to nourish it to make it long lasting. Like a bonsai tree, it needs trimming, watering and caring.

Suggested readings: The Success Principles, by Jack Canfield